I can’t sleep. Not yet. I miss someone so badly right now, that my eyes won’t close to let rest and relax take over. It really sucks, doesn’t it?

And so I’m sitting here now in my corner of the bedroom, playing mobile games on my cell with the audio off. My brothers and Jessie are sleeping already, only Auto is still awake to download information from the Internet to his databank. But he’s not talking, or we’d end up waking up the others.

It feels so lonely without Chrissa around… I haven’t seen her daily email today, and she won’t answer the phone. She might just be out with her family again, perhaps spending the night at some hotels or resorts, but yeah… I don’t feel ‘complete’ today. I miss her voice, her hugs, her funny emails… Is this how love influences somebody’s life? I would have never imagined it would be like this for me too… Me, a TOY! It does sound weird, doesn’t it?

Oh, I can’t wait for tomorrow to come! Academy classes… I’ll see her there, sitting beside me at the same desk. Such a nice thought! I should get her something before the next weekend, perhaps going to watch a movie together, or buy her something at McDonalds… I want her to feel special, even though she doesn’t know yet… Yeah, she’s not aware of my feelings yet. I’m still trying to understand them better, so, for now, I won’t tell her. Unless she reads this blog…

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This entry was posted on Sunday, January 24th, 2010 at 11:02 pm and is filed under family, love, thoughts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.